A What Massage?!?!?!

So, the gang and I went to get back massages at the Peninsula Hotel last Friday. That was quite an experience. For one, we didn't bring a translator. That was our first mistake. And two, we didn't heed the warnings from Shelly, the other experienced English teacher.

We walked in and Brad and I pointed at what we wanted (the back massage) and from that point on it was all a blur. All of a sudden, Brad and I were whisked away to the men's lockerroom. Before we knew it we were in a giant hot tub waiting for what we thought was going to be our back massages.

After our insides were boiled from the temp of the hot tub, some guy came and grabbed Brad for his "back massage." It turned out to be a back scrub. After they noticed that I was dousing my head with the ice water they were bringing me to drink, they came and got me.

This back massage turned out to be a full body scrub. So I am laying there in all my glory and this guy takes a scrub sponge to my whole body. Things that only I, my future wife, and my doctor can touch were touched and SCRUBBED. It was so weird! Then he flips me over and is scrubbing the other side of me. Let me tell you, the only thing you can do when someone else wipes your butt is giggle.

Soon, the artist was through. I was then forced to fill out some paperwork and give the artist his tip. Mind you, I am still naked. Could they not wait? Then 2 guys come and get me and throw me in the shower. It is so uncomfortable standing there showering while 2 people are watching. What is even more uncomfortable is standing there while they dry you off and then dress you.

I don't think I have ever been naked that long in front of that many people.

Next time I want a massage, I am going to the blind community. I hear it is cheap and good AND less embarrassing.