Therapy Session Part 2

Acupuncture. Needles. Sharp. Electricity. Twitching. Violently. Ridiculous.

Ｉ dared to use cool...

and Chinese hospital in the same sentence.

Ａ couple of weeks ago, Ｉ hurt my back. Ｔhe moment it happened, Ｉ knew it was a big deal. Ｉ mean, Ｉ could move. Ｉ could walk. Ｉ could even squeak and squack. Ｉf Ｉ want to say a something Ｉ just open up and talk. Ｉ can talk...argh. Ｃharlotte's Ｗeb - curses！

Ｉf you know me really well, you know that Ｉ don't trust 3 types of people in this world - mechanics, politicians, and doctors. Ｗell, imagine me trying to trust a doctor in a second language. Ｉt doesn't work. Ａlso, anyone who knows me, knows that Ｉ love to diagnose myself. Ｓo basically, Ｉ went to the hospital with different friends and made them translate my concerns and desires in such a way that Ｉ could lead the doctor to my diagnosis. Ｐrobably not a very good thing in the first place, but it is fun. To make a long story short, Ｉ have...Ｉ am not going to tell you. Ｉt isn't personal but maybe you can look at the ＭＲＩ results and try diagnosing me. ＢＴＷ, ＭＲＩ machines are by far in my "top 5 coolest machines in the the world" list. Ｄon't ask what the others are. Ｉ have no idea.

Ｗell, since we are on ＭＲＩ's, Ｉ have to say this. One of my friends translated for me that day. Ｈe is a Ｆrench major. Ｈis Ｅnglish is great but Ｉ was concerned with the technical language. Ｓo, he asked me if Ｉ had any metal on me, which he said at my prompting, Ｉ said no. Ｎothing on the outside or the inside. Ｗho knows what the others requirements and safety precautions were. Ｉ got inside the machine. Ｉt was tight. Ｉ could have fit in better before when Ｉ had lost weight due to a 2 year diet of veggies and rice but alas, Ｉ gained it all back with a steady diet of chocolate my Ｍom has been feeding me with from overseas.

Ｂack to the topic, Ｉ had done some reading on ＭＲＩ machines. Ｉt seems that they are just some huge electronic magnets. Ａfter watching ＨＯＵＳＥ, ＭＤ, Ｉ know what metal does in one of those machines. （Ｅpisodes 2-1 (prisoner with tatoo metal) and 4-7 (magician with key in stomach).） Ｉ get in the machine and start freakin' out. Ｉ didn't ask my mom if my medical history hinted about any metallic additions to my body or if I was part RoboCop. Oh, and Ｉ am adopted so who knows anyway. Ｉ was just hoping that the metal plate that could be in my head doesn't come lose when the machine starts and goes straight out my forehead. Ｇrotesque, huh？ Ｉ was a little nervous. Ｔurns out the machine didn't hurt me.

Ｓo now Ｉ am suffering from....you thought Ｉ would tell you but you are wrong. Ｉ get to go to therapy now everyday for probably 1/2 a month to a whole month. Ｉ started today. Ｓee pictures below. Ｉ laid on a bed that basically pulled my lower half from my upper half like some medieval torture device. Ｉ liked it. Ｔhen electricity flows through my back in another session and last but not least, Ｉ got to lay on a massaging heat compress. Ｆabulous. Ｉ hope the school pays for this.

Possum Town Nuggets...

Mom's



Mine



I tried.

A Christmas Tree or Value Meal?

So, this year I was going to skip decorating for Christmas this year in order to save money for my spring festival trip. Now, you probably think that my decision was ridiculous but after my friend's experience in Harbin I think I need to save as much money as possible. At least 4000 yuan as possible. One day, while shopping for some of my family's Christmas presents, I added up how much it would cost to buy a tree with some simple decorations. Little did I know that this calculation would soon become the hardest decision of the month...

FLASHBACK: A few weeks ago, it was raining. Surprise! Well, not really, it's Yichang. It rains all the time. (Even now as I am typing, it is raining and someone is shooting off fireworks. Why? Oh, I digress...) Because it was raining, I decided not to go out and buy food that day. I thought to myself, "Self, it is raining. Why not stay in and cook all the food in your freezer for your 3 meals today?" Well, when I went to eat breakfast, I found some bread on the table. "Why cook food when there is bread?" So, I ate the bread. I was satisfied. I continued studying Chinese through the morning. At lunch time, I went into the kitchen to find something to eat. I looked in the cabinet and found peanut butter. Mmm, peanut butter. No bread, no jelly, so no sandwich. BUT, I could eat spoons of peanut butter. 1 jar later, I was satisfied. Lunch was over. The time before supper went fast, I was grading papers. Oh how time flies when you are working on boring crap. Finally, dinner arrived. Up to this point I hadn't cooked the food in the freezer, so dinner was going to be nice. I opened up the freezer and what to my wondering eyes didn't appear? But a miniature sleigh and 8 tiny...well, NOTHING! There was ice in my freezer. Yeah for ice. Boo for no food. Oh how I wanted to go get food but I had no desire to brave the rain In the end, I settled on hot water with honey. It worked...for a little while. I though, maybe I can make it to bed time. I did. I went to bed at 10:30 because I wanted to stop thinking about how hungry I was and how lazy I was for not going to buy food.

Unfortunately, 1:15 am rolls up to my sleeping eyes and I wake up famished. I have to buy food - but where? Yes, there is a 24 hours McDonald's. Do I have money? Maybe, let me check. NO! No money on me. Is there money in the bank? Let me check...after braving the rain and checking, 97 yuan. Can't withdraw 97 yuan so I am, well, screwed. I run back to my house. Can I round up enough change? I check my change bowls, there has to be enough. I count it. 50 yuan in coins and coin equivalent bills e.g., a 10 fen coin has an equivalent paper counterpart. Check out the first picture below. 50 yuan would get me there, a value meal, and back. This could work. By the time I was done counting and taping the coins together so I wouldn't have to count them again at McDonald's it was 3 am. I gave up and went to bed. "Self, let's treat you to another random late night McDonald's trip next week. You deserve it."

Fast forward to last weekend. I saw a Christmas Tree and decorations for 50 yuan. Mickey D's or decorations? Which one? WHICH ONE? I gave up the junk for decorations. I am so thankful now that I decorated. It would have been terrible to open my family's presents to me in a sterile room. Oh, by the way, the Christmas package got here just fine. Check out picture number 2. Anyway, with the 40 lb. Yankee candle that I lugged over here to China that smells of fall and the Christmas decorations in my living room, I am set and ready for Christmas evening. Check out the pic's below of the festiveness. That's it. Goodnight ladies and gentlemen. Goodnight.

Oh and my costume...

I was Quail Man! 3 days after the party one of my favorite students ran up to me and said, "I still remember you wore your underwear on the outside of your shorts." I just laughed, I would be concerned if someone forgot that after 3 days. Even I am still chuckling inside about how ridiculous that was. Boy am I glad I wore underwear that I bought for that day. And FYI, I don't wear that kind of underwear in case you were wondering. Oh, and I wasn't the only one wearing underwear on the wrong side of his clothes. One boy showed up with Mr. Bananaman written on the front and Hello Kitty on the back. Katie dressed up as Hello Kitty. Anyway, I loved my costume mostly because I got that stupid belt to stand up on my forehead. You try it!

Halloween Pics...

Finally.

Halloween this year was different from last year in the sense that the students did better dressing up. Besides all of the foreigners rocking out in China Creativity, the students came up with some pretty neat stuff to. You can check out the pics below.

The night began with most everyone freakin' out over whether or not their costumes were up to par. Every student who appeared needed more assistance with get dressed or make-up than I imagined. Of course, they should be cut some slack. Halloween is the foreigners' holiday not theirs. After several students experienced Brad's dead body on the ground, he was resurrected in time for a costume competition. What was really funny about this was the fact that all the students were up on stage to show off their costumes and there were maybe 10 foreigners out in the audience. I can't imagine being a model and showing up to walk the runway for an empty house. Oh well, it was funny to me. My friend Felix does scary-black-clothes-and-white-bloody-face-monster really well. One of Brad's old students looked fabulous in a traditional Chinese outfit. Of course, my old and new English majors were a delight to see. There pirates, monkeys, superheroes, and "who-knows?" among them. My personal favorite was the milk carton. The costume was good but the student is even more hilarious. 3 of Brad's students showed up, one of them being Brad #2. All of them dressed up as Super Bush - Super George W. Bush. Brad #2 (who was the main Super Bush) is just out of control. The night concluded with a "Dead Witch Project". Brad narrated the project while all the students touch different party parts of the dead witch. These parts, thankfully, were made of food. So no worries. We didn't find a dead witch to dissect in China. Enjoy the achievement of making costumes in China!

Day 1 & 2 of October Holiday...

A little late probably, but I know some of you are still waiting to hear about my 2nd October Holiday experience. (Grandma are you one of the "some of you"?)

Well, after a nice little train traveling experience, my friend and I arrived in Liu Zhou. It was in this town that we had to find a bus to Guilin. It wasn't difficult because I was accompanied by a Chinese friend. It was dark when we began our 2 hour journey to Guilin but the sun was up as we came upon the city. Oh how spectacular it was. The mountains in Guilin are so strange. On the main drag, you could pass building, house, store, mountain peak, and school. Put this formula on repeat and you have the drive into the center of town. These peaks are exactly like the ones you see at the Chinese restaurants in America. You know the ones that I am talking about - the pictures that have still mountains and the water is actually moving and making babbling sounds. Just like that. Not so cheesy of course. (And I have no pictures of this actually occurance.) (Oh, and I can't find the word occurance in the dictionary so I made it up. It needed to be made up anyway.)

We spent most of the day searching for travel help to get to Yangshuo (subject of one of the following posts). I paid 200 yuan as a deposit for our tickets and agreed to pay the rest the following day. I mention this only because my friend and I both forgot to pay our remaining portions. Oh well, they charged us like crazy anyway since it was Golden Week Vacation. On a side note, they tell us not to travel during 3 periods of the year. Unfortunately, those are 3 of 4 periods anyone can travel. Even more unfortunate, the 4th period of time is when I come home for the summer.

We walked around all day trying all kinds of cool things. I ate horse meat. Not bad, kind of like thin strips of crispy beef. We found Da Ma Hua. Which is a wonderful treat from another area in China. It is often rare to find and we only found it once while on vacation. I made it last for 2 weeks because of that. Guilin is nice during the day but even more gorgeous at night around the river system. Just check out the pics below. Other than that, no really interesting stories about the first 1 and a half. I did eat stomach lining but that really isn't a new experience. Oh, and that is a waterfall on the front of the hotel. It is a neat concept. Everyday at 8:30 pm or so the waterfall begins and the classical music sings out from the sides of the building. It really is a neat hotel. Just too expensive. Oh well, free entertainment.