Possum Town Nuggets...

Mom's



Mine



I tried.

A Christmas Tree or Value Meal?

So, this year I was going to skip decorating for Christmas this year in order to save money for my spring festival trip. Now, you probably think that my decision was ridiculous but after my friend's experience in Harbin I think I need to save as much money as possible. At least 4000 yuan as possible. One day, while shopping for some of my family's Christmas presents, I added up how much it would cost to buy a tree with some simple decorations. Little did I know that this calculation would soon become the hardest decision of the month...

FLASHBACK: A few weeks ago, it was raining. Surprise! Well, not really, it's Yichang. It rains all the time. (Even now as I am typing, it is raining and someone is shooting off fireworks. Why? Oh, I digress...) Because it was raining, I decided not to go out and buy food that day. I thought to myself, "Self, it is raining. Why not stay in and cook all the food in your freezer for your 3 meals today?" Well, when I went to eat breakfast, I found some bread on the table. "Why cook food when there is bread?" So, I ate the bread. I was satisfied. I continued studying Chinese through the morning. At lunch time, I went into the kitchen to find something to eat. I looked in the cabinet and found peanut butter. Mmm, peanut butter. No bread, no jelly, so no sandwich. BUT, I could eat spoons of peanut butter. 1 jar later, I was satisfied. Lunch was over. The time before supper went fast, I was grading papers. Oh how time flies when you are working on boring crap. Finally, dinner arrived. Up to this point I hadn't cooked the food in the freezer, so dinner was going to be nice. I opened up the freezer and what to my wondering eyes didn't appear? But a miniature sleigh and 8 tiny...well, NOTHING! There was ice in my freezer. Yeah for ice. Boo for no food. Oh how I wanted to go get food but I had no desire to brave the rain In the end, I settled on hot water with honey. It worked...for a little while. I though, maybe I can make it to bed time. I did. I went to bed at 10:30 because I wanted to stop thinking about how hungry I was and how lazy I was for not going to buy food.

Unfortunately, 1:15 am rolls up to my sleeping eyes and I wake up famished. I have to buy food - but where? Yes, there is a 24 hours McDonald's. Do I have money? Maybe, let me check. NO! No money on me. Is there money in the bank? Let me check...after braving the rain and checking, 97 yuan. Can't withdraw 97 yuan so I am, well, screwed. I run back to my house. Can I round up enough change? I check my change bowls, there has to be enough. I count it. 50 yuan in coins and coin equivalent bills e.g., a 10 fen coin has an equivalent paper counterpart. Check out the first picture below. 50 yuan would get me there, a value meal, and back. This could work. By the time I was done counting and taping the coins together so I wouldn't have to count them again at McDonald's it was 3 am. I gave up and went to bed. "Self, let's treat you to another random late night McDonald's trip next week. You deserve it."

Fast forward to last weekend. I saw a Christmas Tree and decorations for 50 yuan. Mickey D's or decorations? Which one? WHICH ONE? I gave up the junk for decorations. I am so thankful now that I decorated. It would have been terrible to open my family's presents to me in a sterile room. Oh, by the way, the Christmas package got here just fine. Check out picture number 2. Anyway, with the 40 lb. Yankee candle that I lugged over here to China that smells of fall and the Christmas decorations in my living room, I am set and ready for Christmas evening. Check out the pic's below of the festiveness. That's it. Goodnight ladies and gentlemen. Goodnight.

Oh and my costume...

I was Quail Man! 3 days after the party one of my favorite students ran up to me and said, "I still remember you wore your underwear on the outside of your shorts." I just laughed, I would be concerned if someone forgot that after 3 days. Even I am still chuckling inside about how ridiculous that was. Boy am I glad I wore underwear that I bought for that day. And FYI, I don't wear that kind of underwear in case you were wondering. Oh, and I wasn't the only one wearing underwear on the wrong side of his clothes. One boy showed up with Mr. Bananaman written on the front and Hello Kitty on the back. Katie dressed up as Hello Kitty. Anyway, I loved my costume mostly because I got that stupid belt to stand up on my forehead. You try it!

Halloween Pics...

Finally.

Halloween this year was different from last year in the sense that the students did better dressing up. Besides all of the foreigners rocking out in China Creativity, the students came up with some pretty neat stuff to. You can check out the pics below.

The night began with most everyone freakin' out over whether or not their costumes were up to par. Every student who appeared needed more assistance with get dressed or make-up than I imagined. Of course, they should be cut some slack. Halloween is the foreigners' holiday not theirs. After several students experienced Brad's dead body on the ground, he was resurrected in time for a costume competition. What was really funny about this was the fact that all the students were up on stage to show off their costumes and there were maybe 10 foreigners out in the audience. I can't imagine being a model and showing up to walk the runway for an empty house. Oh well, it was funny to me. My friend Felix does scary-black-clothes-and-white-bloody-face-monster really well. One of Brad's old students looked fabulous in a traditional Chinese outfit. Of course, my old and new English majors were a delight to see. There pirates, monkeys, superheroes, and "who-knows?" among them. My personal favorite was the milk carton. The costume was good but the student is even more hilarious. 3 of Brad's students showed up, one of them being Brad #2. All of them dressed up as Super Bush - Super George W. Bush. Brad #2 (who was the main Super Bush) is just out of control. The night concluded with a "Dead Witch Project". Brad narrated the project while all the students touch different party parts of the dead witch. These parts, thankfully, were made of food. So no worries. We didn't find a dead witch to dissect in China. Enjoy the achievement of making costumes in China!

Day 1 & 2 of October Holiday...

A little late probably, but I know some of you are still waiting to hear about my 2nd October Holiday experience. (Grandma are you one of the "some of you"?)

Well, after a nice little train traveling experience, my friend and I arrived in Liu Zhou. It was in this town that we had to find a bus to Guilin. It wasn't difficult because I was accompanied by a Chinese friend. It was dark when we began our 2 hour journey to Guilin but the sun was up as we came upon the city. Oh how spectacular it was. The mountains in Guilin are so strange. On the main drag, you could pass building, house, store, mountain peak, and school. Put this formula on repeat and you have the drive into the center of town. These peaks are exactly like the ones you see at the Chinese restaurants in America. You know the ones that I am talking about - the pictures that have still mountains and the water is actually moving and making babbling sounds. Just like that. Not so cheesy of course. (And I have no pictures of this actually occurance.) (Oh, and I can't find the word occurance in the dictionary so I made it up. It needed to be made up anyway.)

We spent most of the day searching for travel help to get to Yangshuo (subject of one of the following posts). I paid 200 yuan as a deposit for our tickets and agreed to pay the rest the following day. I mention this only because my friend and I both forgot to pay our remaining portions. Oh well, they charged us like crazy anyway since it was Golden Week Vacation. On a side note, they tell us not to travel during 3 periods of the year. Unfortunately, those are 3 of 4 periods anyone can travel. Even more unfortunate, the 4th period of time is when I come home for the summer.

We walked around all day trying all kinds of cool things. I ate horse meat. Not bad, kind of like thin strips of crispy beef. We found Da Ma Hua. Which is a wonderful treat from another area in China. It is often rare to find and we only found it once while on vacation. I made it last for 2 weeks because of that. Guilin is nice during the day but even more gorgeous at night around the river system. Just check out the pics below. Other than that, no really interesting stories about the first 1 and a half. I did eat stomach lining but that really isn't a new experience. Oh, and that is a waterfall on the front of the hotel. It is a neat concept. Everyday at 8:30 pm or so the waterfall begins and the classical music sings out from the sides of the building. It really is a neat hotel. Just too expensive. Oh well, free entertainment.

Whoa!!!

Cultural discussions are always a blast with the students. Discussion outside the classroom is very good for both me and the students. The students tend to speak more; therefore, I learn more and they practice more. It is a win-win situation. However, I love discussions inside the classroom because that saying "There is power in numbers" rings very true - for my enjoyment. If we are talking in class about something that shocks them, the gasp made by 30 people is just hilarious. More about this later.

The students seem to know a lot about Western culture. Of course, many of their ideas are way off the mark. For example, at English corner last year, both Brad and I were asked if everyone had personal jets. I wish. Now, this is only one example. I am sure there are many more but you get my point. They have ideas about our culture; they just want us to shed some light on some of their confusions. Anyway, I do wish that there were more books out there on modern Chinese society so that I could understand the mainstream Chinese people. I have several good Chinese friends but the closest ones can hardly be representative of the population. (In my opinion, this is the case.)

Anyway, cultural discussions this last week included health and fitness. I let the students discuss Chinese people's obsession with health and fitness then I had them compare similarities and differences with American people's obsession. Naturally, they think American's are fatter. Probably on average our bodies have a larger size but you know that blanket statements don't paint a correct picture. So, in my intrigue I asked my students how much I should weigh. They said 60 kg. I told them I weigh 80 kg. Every single student gasped. There was no air left in the classroom. In response, I asked them if I looked fat and they said no. Now, you may think they were being polite and said no but in some weird irony, Chinese people, the people who can't say many things directly, will tell you when you are fat. So, I believe them. I don't think I look fat. "Well then, why should I weigh 60 kg?" No response.

As skinny as Chinese people are, it is amazing how obsessed they are with losing weight or staying thin. Girls especially think this way and they are especially thin. It is kind of sad that they feel like they should lose weight. I tried my best at a PSA for accepting yourself and they way you look but I don't think it will take.

My main reason for writing is that they students said there are all kinds of weight loss pills in China. As I entered a pharmacy the other day, I noticed a whole shelf of them - all natural ingredients. I wondered for just a minute if it would hurt to take some but that was soon over. English translations of titles can really change peoples minds on things. The one particular weight loss pill that caught my eye was called "Fat Incendiary Bomb". If only my Chinese friends knew enough English to really enjoy the ridiculousity of that translation. I know you do. If you want some, let me know!

The October Holiday Experience...Trains

Like most holiday vacations in China, the trip to Guilin was made by train. Train rides are always interesting experiences; if not for the conditions of the experience, then for the multitudes of children that tend to find foreigners no matter where they are on the train. It never fails, children find me on the train. I dream of riding on trains relaxing in the hard sleeper cabin while reading a book as the scenes of China's countryside whiz by and the clanking of the train cars beats steadily on my ears.

Though this dream has yet to become a reality, it is hardly anything to complain about. The children that I run into on the trains are quite entertaining. It always begins with a small child passing by the berth that I occupy and seeing me in the corner of his or her eye. These children- they see, they pass, they return, I smile, they smile, and then they run away. In no less than 5 minutes, the child returns to pass by once more. He steps further into the berth as if to test the waters. I smile. He smiles and then takes off again. And so begins, a 30 minute game of him and his newfound young cohorts on the train running down the walkway, slowing down enough to look in and smile, and then take off at breakneck speed after I smile at them. The fact that I am a foreigner attracts the attention of many children on the train. At some point, the children, after discussing what to do in their huddle, get the courage to come and talk to me. Maybe they just get tired of seeing my teeth. I don't know. "We're tired of looking at his teeth, let's see if we can get him to talk." In their bravery, they overestimate the amount of Chinese I might know. They come crashing in yelling all kinds of things in Chinese. In my broken Chinese, I try to answer. My favorite thing about this is when they laugh hysterically at the things that I say. It isn't long before I figure out that the responses I provide are not even close to the correct responses to their statements. Children: "Where are you going?" Me: "I like living in China." Children: "Are you from America?" Me: I know, the time is 8:30 pm." One day, I'll get it.

Recently, I have gotten brave with these little children. 60% of the time they want to talk to me in order to practice English. I let them practice, but I can only take general greetings for so long. After my boredom sets in, I proceed to practice my Chinese. In doing so, I always get to the verb for singing. This is my favorite part. I can't have full conversations in Chinese yet, but I can make suggestions. Boy is it fun to suggest that they sing. Of course, they will do it willingly. Something about Chinese culture: people ask each other to perform all the time. When asked, students, teachers, and children will perform; circumstances not withstanding. They are shocked when foreigners don't jump at the opportunity. I wonder if they think we all love to perform because they see so many performance TV shows like American Idol or movies where young people are trying to become famous. Whatever the case may be, the children performed when I asked. "Take me to your heart" "God is a girl" "Yesterday once more" Songs they performed for me. Of course, I was asked to perform in turn. Why do they love "My heart will go on"? I won't complain, I know that song and the first part is easy to sing. It pleases them at least.

After a few hours of interacting with these children, my savior, the mandatory lights-out time arrives. It is time to sleep. I like falling asleep to the rumble of the train and the constant swaying of the train car as it races to its destination slower than we would drive on the interstate in America. Overnight trains are nice because I sleep for nearly half of the trip only to wake as we roll slowly into the station where I will alight. This is the typically train ride - an experience worth having over and over again.